I was peeing. Yes, I usually hate speaking of topics that have anything to do with bodily fluids because they are a cop out for humour and are usually brainless and simply gross or just uninteresting. However, I was peeing.
I had only turned the light on to the washroom, so I could see of course. And shut the door of my small bathroom unit that is attached to our kitchen. The door sits a solid inch off the ground, so it is hardly sound proof.
I was midst one of those releases that you realize halfway through, you wish You were sitting. Those with penis in tow know the pros and cons of standing verses sitting while peeing, and standing usually is best for On The Go. However, my bad, I should have sat but I wasn't about to do the awkward hold and spin squat to get down on the seat. So that was problem one, problem two. My roommate comes up to the door and starts talking to me about Shawshank Redemption and how I would enjoy this film. Apparantly it came on television while I embarked on my journey.Now, he continued on regarding the scenography, acting, and story. I'm thinking: this toilet is very resonant, how is he missing this very blatant fact that I have my hands a tad full for conversation. So, because the sound alone is very embarassing, I decide to muff it out by turning on the bathroom fan which is obnoxiously loud. Now, the fan should have deterred conversation, but oh no. He continued, about what, sure as hell I do not know. I couldn't hear him anymore.
To fast forward to the end, I was done, and as I finished I shifted my weight to turn off the fan. And taht is when my footcrampo struck me. He finished his story, I washed my hands, massaged my foot, and limped out of the bathroom, to see him sitting at the kitchen table watching this famed film. I retired to my room for the night, and lamented on this situation that... I am positive has happened to others. The footcramp was a nice little twist I didn't see coming.
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